Hentai Police, no we don’t arrest naked anime chicks.
I first want to say that the only reason I’m giving this game a two-star is because it made me laugh. The rest of the game I just didn’t know what the hell was going on and why I was even playing it. I mean, don’t get me wrong, there’s hentai in here and one might think that’s enough but…it’s so bizarre.
- Developed by Podval Games, KremlinDev
- Published by GOSZAKAZ
- Available on Steam
Who is this game for?
- Achievement hunters
- Gamers who want NSFW with sexual content
- Indie game supporters
- Short-on-time gamers
Game length
Less than an hour
Genres
Explanation to Negative Feedback
Accidental animation skips
This one really ticked me off. During one of the animation scenes, I wanted to turn on the music just to have something to listen to during it since there’s no voice acting, but the moment you click anywhere on the screen, the animation stops.
One of the better scenes…and I got thrown out of it just for wanting to hear music.
Ugh.
Pointless clicking screens
Before you’re actually given a NSFW image, it starts out covering it with icons floating around that you have to click on in order to reveal the full image and it’s like…why? It’s so pointless and makes us have to work more just to look at a picture that you could’ve handed us without spam clicking.
What is that music?
I mean, really. The moment you start the game you’ve got this music blaring in your ears, and there’s someone singing words to it. Which is terrible for a visual novel because you’re trying to read something while someone is singing in your ear. Loudly.
Songs with words are cool and all, but let them fly during only the title screen, or within cutscenes.
Explanation to Positive Feedback
Humor
Honestly, this game didn’t offer me any positive vibes other than the fact that it made me laugh more than once.
Links Worth Checking Out
Hentai Police Review
TL;DR Review
I feel like with a lot of these games I think I know what I’m getting into, and then the game just goes off the rails from what I have in my mind.
With Hentai Police, I couldn’t listen to the music because it was too in your face, which is a shame because if you’re not reading it out loud to some kind of audience then you have to play it in pure silence.
I didn’t like the little bit of gameplay there was because you just click on little floating icons in an insistent manner until they disappear. Why bother? What’s the point of the icons, the relentless spamming to get them off the screen in order to reveal the image that we want to see?
There are a lot more still images than there are animations, but some of the animation scenes aren’t bad to watch.
One in specific comes to mind.
As for the down-and-dirty scenes, aside from the images, there’s not a lot of filthy talk. We start to engage with the women in different scenes, but find out they used to be Russian men that had surgery to change them into a woman.
Kind of LGBT, but not really, since we always decide not to engage.
And that’s sort of the whole problem. Plenty of women for sexual situations, but not enough sexual situations because the game’s all about the humor regarding all the men are now hot women.
It’s not really a game for you to properly get your rocks off, let’s say.
There are a lot more dirtier choices out there.
In-Depth Review
Spoilers / Work in progress
When you first start the game, the title screen has a different name for the game, and it’s something like Omon Girl Bottle Royal…which isn’t what Steam calls it. And during the game there’s a lot of talk about the Riot Police, which made me think that was the game’s title for a while, which wasn’t the case either.
It’s like the devs were confused on what to call it, so now it has three names.
As if the game isn’t confusing enough.
And then like I said before with the music, it’s like some battle royale music going on and eventually there’s lyrics to it, but it’s just out there for a game like this one. I don’t know why they decided to use it here. Plus it continues when you’re in the game.
I don’t know who out there is able to read while also listening to music, but it’s certainly not me. If I hear words I think words and the words I see are no longer there.
During the gameplay, there are going to be miniature chibi girls popping out on the screen on the right side. They’re not naked or anything, they just randomly jump on the screen, or slide into sight, and it’s just purely a distraction that I can’t figure out the reasoning for.
If you want a distraction that bad, at least take their clothes off, come on.
